


Countless

by yestojaejohn



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Fluff, Romance, implied blowjob, just a little bit of angst tho, professional cuddler johnny
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-06 03:07:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16380254
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yestojaejohn/pseuds/yestojaejohn
Summary: Johnny, a professional cuddler to pay his bills is more helpful in ways he didnt know and Y/N, a stressed college student gets help in more ways she didnt know she needed.





	Countless

**Author's Note:**

> Professional cuddler Johnny is the profession he would have if he wasnt an idol and you cant change my mind

Yuta knew Y/N like the back of his hand. Being friends for ten plus years he could tell when she was the most happiest and most distressed; Hell, he was the one who made her feel those ways at times. Although, he’d say for her mental breakdown and constant yelling at her laptop and sleepless nights full of coffee cups and mugs strewn across the place it was schools fault. Y/N took it upon herself to take the hardest classes she could (she claimed in high school that if she got straight A’s in her AP classes, she could easily do college) she overworked herself from the very beginning and now it was affecting Yuta’s life.   
  
  
  
"You  _ what _ ?!" Y/N practically yelled from her laptop, her assignment suddenly forgotten, she whipped her head to the side to see the thin man laying on the couch not even looking at her. Yuta was on his phone, casually biting his lip and rocking his foot back and forth in comfort.   
  
  
  
"I said I got you a professional cuddler for your exams," still not phased at all but certainly feeling the hard gaze of his roommate, Yuta felt no remorse or regret. Okay maybe he does regret wasting $560 for $80 an hour for seven days just so he wouldn't have to deal with Y/N's constant whining and groaning but he had reached the end of his rope and Yuta isn't a man who can take much bullshit from someone; it's a wonder how he's still friends with this worrisome girl.    
  
  
  
Y/N's laptop was forgotten completely now and she faced Yuta not exactly knowing how to take in this information. She had no clue why Yuta would ever consider she needs  _ cuddles _ to feel less stressed. Sure she made a lot of messes, pulling hair out of her head in frustration, making Yuta go out and get coffee for her, forgetting to feed their cat Jinki-   
  
Wait- okay, maybe he did have a reason and maybe he knew her so well that cuddles would make her feel better. But-   
  
"That means I'd be cuddling with some random person, that's just weird."   
  
  
Her roommate scoffed, looking away from his phone to the girl sitting on her knees, "What? Who else would you cuddle?  _ Me _ ?" Okay, Yuta had a point.   
  
  
  
"You're right," She started, "but what makes you think I'd trust the person who will be holding me for, what? Thirty minutes?"   
  
  
  
"An hour actually. You owe me $560 after this."   
  
  
  
"What the fuck, Yuta!" Y/N exclaimed almost grabbing her favorite mug (full of her fifth cup of coffee) and almost,  _ almost _ throwing it on his crotch. Yuta immediately flinched and drew his legs up to his chest in an attempt to escape the feisty girls anger, a few curses leaving his mouth before he laughed.   
  
  
"I'm only joking! You don't owe me a thing, babe!" He pointed at her, his eyes holding an intense and challenging gaze with hers, "Just don't waste it." With a small shake of her head and a confused look, Y/N rolled her eyes and slouched a bit asking him how she'd waste an hour of cuddles. "Consider this a blind date, too, kinda" He said smugly. Then and there, her anger came back and a fist was coming down on his bicep making him yell in pain and a strangled noise come from his mouth when his roommate jumped up on him and wrapped her hands around his wrist to try and resist his limbs from fighting back.   
  
  
  
"What the hell do you mean '  _ blind date _ '?!" Another strangled sound came from the small man but with his strength he flipped them over so he was on top and pinning her wrists down on either side of her head. The scene looked slightly erotic the way he was between her thighs, her sweater ridden up and their heavy breathing mixing together (and how Y/N was trying to get him off by lifting her hips up against his).    
  
"Are you trying to give me a boner to get me off of you?" The question made her freeze and cheeks go flushed red and a spew of 'fuck you's' and 'no's' and a laugh erupted from Yuta's chest as he slowly got off of her. He gotten his phone off the floor that had fell from the mini wrestle match checking the time. "I mean a blind date as in I think you'd like this guy. He's friends with Jaehyun."   
  
  
  
Right, Jaehyun, the guy who Y/N may have blowed at a party when she was half drunk and very very high. That had been so long ago that she could barely remember his face or the sounds he had made that night. The point was, Y/N didn't know if she should trust Jaehyun's taste, he barely knew her and she wasn't going to trust Yuta's taste either since the last guy he introduced her to was some guy majoring in bio mechanics named Doyoung or something, he had jet black hair and just didn't get Y/N's sense of humor and he ended up taking a joke she made the wrong way and went to mansplain the reason why her joke was illogical, didn't make sense and was just downright  _ unfunny _ .    
  
  
  
"What's the guys name?" Y/N asked leaning her back on the arm of the couch. Jinki came out from his hiding spot under the coffee table and hopped up to snuggle in her lap. Rolling into a small swirl of fur and rubbing his face against her knee Y/N took comfort in this and rubbed her hand across his forehead.   
  
  
  
Yuta, still looking down at his phone most likely texting Jaehyun, responded, "Johnny Seo. Really nice dude, I met him last week with Mark. He's from Chicago," his voice was tinted with interest and his eyebrows wiggled.   
  
  
  
"He sounds very white then." Her friend proceeded to shove her with his foot in annoyance.   
  
  
  
"He's super nice and exactly your type. A very... _ soft _ guy. Very romantic, I'm not surprised why he took on to be a professional cuddler."   
  
  
  
"Okay but is he my type physically?"   
  
  
  
He laughed, "tall, handsome, kind, and stupid? Yeah, he's your type." If it wasn't for Jinki in her lap, Yuta would have gotten a face full of pillow and a kick in the shin for that.   
  
  
  
.                    . .   
  
  
  
Monday had rolled around, Friday being the day Yuta told Y/N that her cuddler would be coming over which she found strange, she didn’t really know the basics of this job. She wasn't really educated on the profession and she wasn't really interested in it either, yeah she enjoyed a few cuddles (probably because she has had the lack of them in her adult life) but the idea of a  _ stranger _ made her a little nervous and her hands may have gotten clammy thinking about  _ if _ Johnny was cute and  _ if _ he was even interested in her. Did Jaehyun and Yuta tell  _ him _ that he would like her?   
  
  
  
Just thirty minutes before this  _ Johnny _ was supposed to get here, Yuta grabbed her laptop and stuck it under his arm telling her that she’d get it back after every session (she would have fought him but she was so exhausted from last night’s studies that she flopped back down into her bed).   
  
“We don’t want you stressed and Johnny is a doormat he’d let you do whatever you wanted to feel comfortable with him.”   
  
  
  
Y/N scoffed, “so you’re taking my laptop so I can’t feel comfortable with him, huh?” Just before Yuta left the room he turned around, a smirk playing on his lips.   
  
“That’s not it, I don’t want any distractions for you. Have fun today, pet,” he gave her a wink and left down into the hallway. Y/N looked up at the ceiling and sighed as she listened to Yuta shut the front door.   
  
  
  
All alone. Well, not for long. God, was she frustrated. She had an exam this morning and it just about jumbled her brain and made her cry to the point where she was too emotionally exhausted to even think about how a man she had never met was going to be here for an  _ hour _ to  _ hold her _ . Okay, maybe the thought did make her heart beat a little faster and maybe she was the tiniest bit excited. Y/N would be lying to herself if she said she wasn’t excited to meet Johnny Seo.   
  
  
  
So when she heard a knock at the door and Jinki’s meow crying she knew  _ he _ was here. With sweaty palms and toes curling in her socks, Y/N made her way down the hallway to the front door where after a few seconds there were two more knocks and another meow from Jinki who sat at the door looking up at it. With a little push to the cat to move out of the way and the unlocking of a door, Y/N opened it.   
  
  
  
The man was tall. Very tall. Y/N had to look up just to meet her eyes with him! But before she did she took a few seconds to see that he was wearing a plain t-shirt with a single red stripe across the chest that was much too big for him and a cardigan with tan and brown squares on it, that article of clothing also was too big for him and he had obvious sweater paws; how did he know that was a way to get to Y/N’s heart? Perhaps this guy did a background check on her. He wore some black slim sweatpants that had a white stripe over the sides of them, with his t-shirt tucked and tennis shoes adorned on his feet he looked proper comfortable and warm on such a cold day. She assumed this was Johnny.    
  
  
  
And Yuta was right, he was her type. When she met his gaze she didn’t have much time to stare at him because his already warm chocolate brown eyes bore into hers so much so it made her flustered so she fixed her gaze between his eyebrows. She did take note, however, of his black hair that looked oh so soft and shiny, it looked a little messy and wavy and went just a little past his eyebrows.   
  
  
  
“Johnny?” She quipped, raising a hand. She wasn’t sure if shaking his hand was the right thing considering he was holding bags in both of his hands. He moved one bag to the other, a warm smile on his lips as he firmly grasped her hand.   
  
  
  
“That’s me! You’re Y/N then? I like your shirt,” he pointed to it once he let the handshake end. At this point Y/N had gotten caught up in his lips and the way they moved, they were plump and very pink and she absolutely adored the way the ends of his mouth seemed to curl up. But the admiration quickly left when she looked down at her shirt.   
  
  
  
Don’t ask Y/N why she had owned an oversized t-shirt that was a pastel pink color with rubber ducks and red hearts all over it. She remembered she needed a sleep shirt and she hopped into a thrift store to get something cheap and big and this was the first thing that she was satisfied with. She said a quiet thank you telling him that she’s embarrassed that he had to see her in that shirt. The sweet Johnny told her it’s fine and with a giggle, Y/N was inviting him in.   
  
  
  
Johnny definitely could tell that the place was mainly run by Yuta and not Y/N. Judging by the way the place didn't seem to have any sort of famine touch to it and there were shelves of china and photos of Yuta and friends and family Y/N didn't take much part in the interior decor. Both her roommate and Jaehyun told of their encounters with her, Yuta mainly taking the lead in that since Jaehyun only knew her from that sexual encounter that Johnny certainly didn’t need or want to know. But she was a client, it wasn’t like this was a date or anything even though Yuta was trying to make it seem that way to the tall man.   
  
  
  
“You’ll like her, she’s your type,” he said to the cuddler. And Yuta was right, he just forgot one small detail:   
  
**Johnny doesn’t date his clients** . Even though he had many opportunities (and requests) for a “netflix and chill” moment he didn’t take up that offer. Johnny liked to try and keep it professional, even if he did get some clients who were reasonably attractive and actually told or asked him if they could have some “fun.”    
  
  
  
Y/N was nice though, he could tell. Even though she did seem the tiniest bit uncomfortable judging by how sweaty her hand was and how she just drew her shoulders up slightly as she sat on the couch telling him in a forced tone that he could make himself comfortable.    
  
  
  
"I have no idea how we do this-" she started once he sat on the other end of the couch making sure there was enough space between them to make her comfortable. From there Johnny took a peek at her, her legs drawn up to her chest, she wore some navy blue pajama shorts that looked rather soft and warm despite how little they covered her legs. From there he could see she had her toe nails painted, as well as her fingernails both the color of raven black. When she turned to look at him he immediately met her gaze and smiled.   
  
  
  
"Some people don't. It's pretty simple, really, We go to a bed, stay here on the couch, or I brought a blanket and pillows with me. Whatever you want, I do," alright that end sounded the tiniest bit sexual and he always slips up on that bit. Johnny was just too pure minded to really think of any of that sexual stuff because his job was to cuddle not to fulfill someone's sexual fantasy, he was no prostitute that's for sure. Y/N was charmed by it and giggled when he nervously laughed and rubbed a hand over the small hairs at the back of his neck. His neck was long, very long, the girl noticed, she saw how his Adam's apple bobbed when he swallowed a lump in his throat; she wondered if that happened to be a soft spot for him.   
  
  
  
_ Get your head out of the gutter, Y/N! He's obviously treating you like a client, not some date! _   
  
  
As she fought with her subconscious self she smiled at him, saying she was most comfortable with his blanket and pillows. She had deduced correctly on the contents in the bag once Johnny pulled them out, a nice warm and thick quilt that looked to be made by some grand mother or mother, either way it seemed special to the tall boy (or maybe it didn't considering he brought it to use it with a stranger). He proceeded to take out two pillows from the other bag, apologizing for taking so long once Y/N stood up from the couch. Jinki came up and purred at her feet, rubbing his face against her calf, Johnny noticed and smiled.   
  
  
  
"What's her name?" He asked, eyes warm and loving towards the cat, she was almost jealous just from the gaze he gave to her pet.   
  
  
  
"It's a boy, his name is Jinki," she leaned down to scratch the side of his face that he was continuously kneading on her.   
  
  
  
Johnny's eyes lit up and laughed, "like the member from SHINee?!" He let out- what Y/N was the cutest laugh in existence- a giggle and clapped his hands together, "thats amazing, I love him already. You have good taste too." Now, Y/N knows that was just an innocent compliment, maybe it was because all she got from Yuta was bickering and criticizing of everything she was doing and never receiving any praises for doing something right that she let this little comment go straight to her heart. Her cheeks went warm and she smiled thanking him, trying to keep his cool.   
  
  
  
The rest of the time was mildly quiet, Johnny asked her if it was okay to move the coffee table to lay the quilt down, he neatly placed the pillows next to each other indicating one was for her and the other for him. All this time Johnny asked her some questions, getting a feel of what made her comfortable.   
  
"Do you want to put on some music, movie?" God, this sounded so sexual despite how unadulterated this whole thing has been, Y/N just couldn't get her head out of the gutter and she felt bad for it because Johnny was being so undiluted and careful that you could tell he wasn’t taking his words in any tainted way.   
  
  
  
"A movie would be nice, I feel like it'll be weird if it's just silent."   
  
  
  
Johnny shrugged, "some people want it quiet," he plopped down on the quilt on his tummy after taking his cardigan off and folded it onto the back of the couch. He watched as Y/N quietly flicked through Hulu, finding some movie she had watched recently Moonrise Kingdom, she remembered Yuta quite not liking it but she thought it was a nice indie film, choosing it Johnny had made a comment that he never heard of the movie. When she turned around to look at him it certainly clicked in her head that this man, Johnny Seo was going to be here for an hour, cuddling her.   
  
  
  
Somehow without even cuddling her he was already helping her stress disperse. Perhaps it was how carefree he seemed to be and how cozy he seemed, his voice was comforting and she could sense a hint of a lisp to his voice that just seemed to add to his precious aura. She didn't mean to but she ended up ignoring his comment and just coming to sit on her knees in front of him. He looked up at her and he really couldn't believe just how appealing she looked, maybe it was the lamp just behind her that was making it seem like she had some sort of glow to her, or maybe she just had that glow naturally. Either way Johnny mentally cursed at Yuta for telling him that she was exactly the kind of girl he'd like, maybe if he hadn't told him that he wouldn't feel as nervous as he does now. Hell, his hands became warm, for someone whose hands were almost always cold his now had a sheer layer of sweat on them.   
  
  
  
"So, uh," Y/N twiddled her thumbs, biting her bottom lip, not sure what the hell to do in this situation.   
  
  
  
Johnny smiled for what seemed like the hundredth time, does he ever not look like such a cutie? Most likely not. "Little spoon or big spoon?"   
  
  
  
Y/N was taken aback, pointing to herself, "me?" A single nod came from the soft man and he asked her again which she preferred. "I like being the little spoon, I guess..." That was when Johnny rolled to his side and laid his arm on his left side across the side of his body. Goodness he was...long...he could wrap his arm around her two times! He patted the space next to him to try and relieve the nervous tension Y/N had put upon herself. Once again she was taken aback by how handsome he truly was, his smile widened when she scooted closer, his t-shirt ridden up the slightest bit on his hip and he had his sleeves rolled up to his mid bicep. His skin looked oh so soft and once Y/N had her back to him he gently put a hand to her arm making her heart race.   
  
  
  
"How do you like to be held?" His voice dropped into almost a whisper and she almost tingled with warmth at the feeling of his breath on the back of her ear. She took a deep breath and told him that he just liked an arm around her.   
  
  
  
"I'm not too picky with cuddles, I'll take what I can get."   
  
  
  
Johnny slid his arm underneath hers, he wasn't too sure where to put his hand, he was usual the most comfortable in this situation, probably because most of his clients knew what they wanted in an exact way. Y/N was different though, I mean he didn't exactly know how she felt about all this but judging by her body clenching all at once he could tell she wasn't really enjoying this.   
  
  
  
And he was right. Y/N was tremendously nervous and didn't know what the hell to do. She couldn't remember the last time she felt a warm chest on her back and the soft tufts of hair tickling her as well as the breaths against her neck. It must have been year since the last time she had this and it had become unnatural and alien to her, she had no idea what to do with her limbs.   
  
  
  
"You're very tense," Y/N almost scolded him for telling her the obvious but he was still a stranger to her.   
  
  
  
"Maybe it's because I have no idea who you are." She felt the presence of his head leave and she figured he leaned back a little bit, there was a sigh that did not hold any annoyance but more so thought.   
  
  
  
"You know I'm friends with Jaehyun and I know Yuta."   
  
  
  
Y/N scoffed, "Jaehyun," she said in a whispered tone, "I barely know him." She felt Johnny’s arm tighten around her slightly.   
  
  
  
“Well judging by what he told me, you know him very well.”   
  
  
  
“I was fucked up and he was horny, we only met a few times before then. He’s really nothing to me,” Y/N sighed. “How come you agreed to do this?”   
  
  
  
Johnny rolled back to where he was as he laughed passively, “I’m getting $560 for this, it’s my  _ job _ , Y/N. Why wouldn’t I do this?” Okay, now she was anything but comfortable and she suddenly hated the feeling of the warm body curved into her shape. She wiggled slightly in discomfort and sighed telling him she didn’t feel good. “You want to cut this short?”   
  
  
  
“I don’t know if I ever want this again,” she said with some regret. She wished she kept her mouth shut because even though she couldn’t see it she could tell it hit Johnny in a way that hurt him. He did take it to heart, he thought he was a pretty nice guy, he was very giving and kind. No one ever really said bad things about him because, well, there wasn't much bad about him, men and women alike tended to compliment him throughout his whole life. So he sat up, making Y/N turn, he couldn't even look at her anymore, so he pulled his phone out.   
  
  
  
"Alright, I'll text Yuta and tell him he can have a refund."    
  
  
  
Well, fuck. Now she really felt bad for saying that. Not only had she hurt his feelings but she was also telling him that he didn't want him to get paid the money he obviously deserved. It was Y/N who was letting her insecurities and lack of physical touch let her not have a good time. Fuck finals week, fuck her self-doubt and uncertainty. Y/N decided to stop him, sitting up and grabbing at his hand which took them both by surprise, Johnny looked at her this time with no warm gaze but a puzzled and almost seething stare. With eyebrows furrowed and lips parted he asked her what. The timid girl slowly drew her hand away.   
  
  
  
"I'm sorry. I do want this, in fact I think I  _ need _ it," she laughed in an attempt to raise his spirits but the irate man seemed even more muddled. "I mean, I'm just-fuck, man," she drew a hand atop her head and sighed, "it's been a long time since I've had... _ this _ and I'm just...I feel bad for saying that, I'm sorry, Johnny."   
  
  
  
She felt like a proper asshole, even after Johnny quietly forgave her and they proceeded to try and continue the session they both had this ache in their heart that  _ maybe _ this wasn't such a good idea.   
  
  
  
This had been the worst blind date Y/N had been on.   
  
  
  
.                    . .   
  
  
  
Yuta had teased her when he came back from whatever he was doing while Johnny was in their dorm, she thought he was probably spying on them the entire time. He poked at her sides and asked her how it went, and she told him honestly just how bad it was to which he pinched her cheek and scolded her for being so on edge about everything.  _ Let loose for once, Y/N. Any girl would die to be in your shoes, Johnny is a tough egg to crack. _ _  
_ _  
_   
  
He really wasnt when it came to Y/N.    
  
  
  
The second session was less awkward thankfully. After a thorough discussion on what she liked, Johnny and Y/N came to understand each other and when she had become more open with him it was easier for them to get along. Y/N wasn't too sure why she had been so afraid of him. She could see through him, read him like a fucking book. He was soft all over and judging by what he told her about himself, he was a man who had a resting bitch face but who supposedly had a collection of stuffed animals on his bed, he liked having warm tea when he can't sleep and rereads a lot of books. He enjoys alone time in the library and tries to get out of the house every now and then just so he feels like he didn't waste his day. With the opening up to themselves Y/N told him a bit of how she met Yuta, saying he had flirted with her for the first year of knowing them in their preteen years she giggled in Johnny's arms as she told of how he was technically her first kiss and how  _ awful _ he was. The cuddler joined in on her laughs and without a movie or music on they had a better time. Y/N felt loose and warm in both Johnny's arms and fixed stare, he was very confident in his eye contact and it flustered Y/N (which he thought was sweet) to the point where she'd stare at his cheek or the single piercing he had on his ear. A small single loop, he had mentioned briefly that his mother got it for him and he wears it on the days he misses her the most- which was every day.  Y/N smiled at how caring Johnny was, she smiled so much that she just about forgot her need for coffee and stress of the exam she had the next day.   
  
  
  
.                    . .   
  
  
  
Johnny knew he shouldn't, and he tried not to, but he was a hopeless romantic and craved the smallest bit of romance. But he liked Y/N, he had a crush on her. But that's really how he had gone through so much heartbreak, trusting too soon and being slapped in the face that people really only adored his body and never the emotional support he could give them. He was truly fucked because even though she was a client, Y/N was always on his mind and he often wondered how she was doing during the times when she wasn't against his chest and had her scent on the tip of his nose during that hour. He hoped she was doing well and getting enough rest, eating well and acing her exams.   
  
  
  
Now, Y/N was only doing one of those things, she was getting fantastic grades from how she felt, she was confident in her finals but the moment Johnny left it was back to studying and late night sessions. Yuta was content though because she was quieter and less messy, she hadn't been wasting her money on coffee as much, Jinki's water bowl was always full and his litter was clean. Yuta took a mental note to thank Johnny. In just three days their lives were improving but the tall man was even in more turmoil.   
  
  
  
He can’t get caught up in his feelings for someone, he just can't. Not again, he doesn't want to. But Y/N is exactly the person he needed in his life. He'd just about die if he were to see her outside his business hours. And this is where we are.   
  
  
  
Johnny sees her of course, she may a look a bit different with makeup on her face and the double denim she was pulling off with a loose t-shirt that had some rock band name on it he didnt recognize, but he knew it was her. He watched her, worrying for her wellbeing as this party was slowly getting crazier and drunker minute by minute. She was glued to her friends side, some girl he couldn't put a name to but he had seen her working at the grocery store just down the road from his apartment. She looked loose and happy though, a nice smile on her face, her hair styled in a way that made his heart beat quicken and hands get clammy. She wore one of those ugly Christmas sweaters but fall themed, it was a dark orange with white outlines of fall leaves on them, he could make out her eye shadow that matched with her sweater and how her figure looked so cute and  _ good _ in her dark blue jeans. She looked comfy and cuddable.   
  
  
  
Johnny would rather die than let her see him, though. Not that he didn’t want to talk to her, he was just nervous and knowing him he’d get too shy to speak and end up spilling a drink on her or stepping on her foot or just straight up falling into her.   
  
  
  
“You’re like, eye fucking that girl. What’s up?” Johnny rolled his eyes almost immediately hearing his voice.   
  
  
  
“I’m not eye fucking,  _ Ten _ ,” he turned to his shorter friend. Ten was an art major and they had known each other since high school, it was a surprise Johnny hadn’t told Ten about Y/N and his crush. Maybe he was too embarrassed to admit it.    
  
  
  
“Well,” Ten took a sip from his red solo cup, “whatever you’re doing you’re really staring at her. Who is she?”   
  
  
  
“A client,” Johnny said tightly, more so trying convince himself that she was  _ just _ a client and nothing else. Just a client. Client. He was paid to be with her, you shouldn’t get involved with people you’re just going to know for a few days and then forget about by next week.    
  
  
  
But Johnny has a feeling he wouldn’t forget her.   
  
  
  
“Right, a client,” Ten always seemed to have a smirk on his face when he was catching Johnny in a lie. He never exposed Johnny and confronted him on his lie, so he stood there staring at her with the tall guy. “She’s cute. Your type.”   
  
  
  
“Everyone keeps saying that,” Johnny sighed, the grip on his cup tightening. “And she is. I hate this, Ten.”   
  
  
  
He patted a hand on his shoulder, “Johnny, you have more guts than you think you do, just tell her how you feel.”   
  
  
  
Johnny’s brows furrowed and he pouted whole replying, “I don’t like her like that.” He almost slapped the smile on Ten’s face in that moment, there a rub to his shoulder and then he saw his short friend drift away into the sea of people in his peripheral vision. He looked away for a second when he heard a glass shatter and a scream, a drunk girl was seen with a bottle and a guy sat on the floor over his broken beer bottle, she laughed and a string of curses left the guy’s mouth as he started yelling at the girl. Johnny turned away when the girl grabbed the guy’s collar and forced a kiss from him. It left the lonely guy with a bad taste in his mouth, raising his cup to his mouth he was looking back at Y/N.    
  
  
  
Who was staring right back at him.   
  
  
  
He just about choked on his drink, droplets falling on his shirt and wobbling on his feet. She smiled to him and waved to him shyly, she wasn’t too sure if she should have done that but judging by the way Johnny sent a tiny wave back to her they were both content and feeling their hearts flutter.    
  
  
  
.                    . .   
  
  
  
Johnny’s arm is around Y/N the next time he sees her and his heart feels like it’s bursting out of his chest with each pump sending blood to the tips of his fingers and to the tips of his toes. He was warm all over and he barely spoke to her at all for thirty minutes.   
  
  
  
“Johnny?” Y/N whispered, her voice made his ears perk and he instantly answered. “I fell asleep, I’m sorry.” He smiled, his arm just wrapping around her more, he almost had the urge to dig his nose into her neck and close his eyes to tell her it was okay, he wanted to kiss the spot behind her ear and be like this every time they got to be together.   
  
  
  
Fuck, Johnny was really falling.   
  
  
  
“It’s okay,” he said.   
  
  
  
“You were just so warm and quiet, plus I had a really long study session last night. Yuta had to carry me back to my bed,” she laughed, rubbing her eyes. She sat up, he could see the sleep marks on her face and her arms when she turned towards him, in fact he almost giggled at how messy her hair was but he kept it in and just ended up smiling at her. She laughed again, “why are you smiling like that?” Her cheeks flushed, he had the warmest look on his face as his eyes darted around her features and he couldn’t stop thinking about being like this with her every morning and night. But when she said this he was brought out of his trance and he was looking down at his pillow.   
  
  
  
“Sorry, you just looked kinda funny.”    
  
  
  
_ FUNNY? YOU LOOKED KINDA FUNNY? WHAT THE HELL JOHNNY SEO _ ? His eyes widened in horror and Y/N watched his cheeks go tomato red. But she took it in stride and laughed even harder, agreeing with him and giving him a playful slap on the shoulder.   
  
  
  
“How much more time do we have?” She asked, stretching her arms up and yawning loudly. She heard him say just about twenty minutes left and she sighed, “well, I’m feeling peckish; want some snacks? I can make something?”   
  
  
  
The thought of sitting with her at a table and seeing her be domestic and cook for him made his face go hot and made his heart spasm, with her in her little shorts and oversized t-shirt surely Johnny would just collapse there on the spot. But he said sure and even offered to cook to which she declined.   
  
  
  
Now Johnny knew he shouldn’t be doing this, this was his work hour for god’s sake! He shouldn’t have said yes and he shouldn’t have made stupid dad jokes that she snorted at and quote vines together. That’s not what they should be doing, they just don’t do that. This was supposed to be strictly a professional relationship but somehow it turned into a friendship that was blooming into something else underneath all their smiles and small comments to each other.   
  
  
  
“Johnny,” Y/N said in a tone that worried him, he never heard her voice so stern it was almost like the way his mother said his name before scolding him.    
  
  
  
“Y/N,” he replied, trying to relieve his stress and add a bit of teasing humor to it but Y/N’s face looked a little red in the cheeks and paler everywhere else. She was stirring some chili in a pot as she thought for a moment, trying to figure out  _ how _ to ask him.   
  
  
  
“I was wondering...Yuta invited me to this bonfire and apparently there’s gonna be some people I don’t know and I was wondering if you wanted to come with me? I know we’re like-like-not really friends per say but it would be cool to be with someone I felt comfortable around.”   
  
  
  
Okay, two things.   
  
-She was invited him to a bonfire   
-She felt comfortable around him   
  


Johnny just about felt his heart leap into his throat at the thought of seeing her out of business hours. If he could barely handle her at a party how could he handle being her “date” to a bonfire? He could only think of the softest and most romantic things he wanted to do with her at such a place like that.   
  
  
  
“Jaehyun’s grandpa apparently has a farm and he’s house sitting while they go off to Paris for two weeks starting next week and he wanted to throw some stupid parties. It’s okay if you don’t want to go, I just was wondering-“   
  
  
  
“I would love to. I’d like to think we’re friends, I mean...I know it’s wrong to say that but-“ he drew his hand through his dark hair trying to brush the bangs away only for them to fall back in the same place. Y/N smiled and turned the stove off, taking the pot off the burner and pulling out two bowls and spoons for the two of them.   
  
  
  
“We both go to the same school, I may not be your client anymore but we can be friends after all that right? Plus this’ll be next week on Friday at 7, okay? I can drive us.” She served their meal and there Johnny knew he’d have to tell her at some point his feelings for her. If only he wasn’t such a scaredy cat.   
  
  
  
.                    . .   
  
  
  
“So, you’re going to the bonfire with Johnny? Does that mean you like him?” Yuta teased the moment he walked into the door. Smelling like pizza and still dressed in his delivery uniform (including the cap with a happy piece of pizza with sunglasses on it), he watched as Y/N glared at him from the couch.   
  
  
  
She put her phone down, paused her show and rolled her eyes, “Johnny is cute, I really like him but I doubt he likes me back.” Yuta just about died on the spot laughing as he took his shoes off.   
  
  
  
“‘ _ He doesn’t like you back _ ’, that’s funny! Please, he’s head over heels for you,” he just about yelled, coming up to his roommate and knocking his knuckles against the top of her head. "He really does like you, I wouldn't be surprised if he ended up confessing to you at the bonfire." Y/N pushed his hand away and huffed with a red hue on her cheeks, she cursed at him until he was leaving towards the bathroom to take a shower still laughing maniacally at the girl.   
  
  
  
.                    . .   
  
  
  
Today was their last day cuddling. Yuta had booked a full week, even when Y/N didn’t have an exam on Saturday, it's not like she needed it. Or maybe Yuta knew she'd be head over heels for him too and  _ want _ to cuddle him for just an extra day.   
  
  
  
This cuddle session was different, they talked like friends (or more than friends...possibly). Y/N faced Johnny and laughed at his stupid little jokes, being so close to him like this was different. It felt more intimate, like a boyfriend came over just to comfort his girlfriend after such a stressful week and decided to hold her and cheer her up rather than go out and buy her things. He had his arm around her waist and then one was slipped underneath her pillow to keep that flow of blood coursing through his arm as she laid her head over it, Johnny had a warm look in his eyes when he listened intently on how much Y/N loved cake pops and how one day she'd want to make them, maybe even make some safe for cats so she could have one for Jinki.    
  
  
  
"I could put them in the freezer and when he's a good cat-which he never is- he could get one," she thought out loud with a chuckle. The conversation made no sense and there was no substance to it but that's exactly what made Johnny love it so much. He felt so  _ nice _ just thinking that she's close enough to him to talk about such pointless things. To anyone it would be pointless and they wouldn't gain anything from it but Johnny felt his heart just swell and he felt warm everywhere seeing how her eyes lit up with every idea she had. "Sorry," she started when she noticed that Johnny hadn't said anything for the past five minutes, "I'm rambling and this is boring."    
  
  
  
He shook his head in disagreement, "it's not boring at all. It's cute." They both nervously giggled and looked away from each other and Johnny had found himself slowly rubbing his fingertips up and down her back slowly, he stopped immediately when he noticed what he was doing and Y/N almost made a sound of complaint but she stopped herself.   
  
  
  
Alright, she did like him. She really liked Johnny Seo, the professional cuddler.   
  
  
  
They talked about other things, things they liked, didn't like, their favorite places, their families. Johnny told about how much he loved his mom and how he really misses her sometimes and when it gets super bad she always seems to call him that night. "She must sense that I'm not okay," he says softly, "how else would she know?"   
  
  
  
"Hm, mothers instinct, I guess," she had her hand on his chest, she could feel his heartbeat, a slow and steady pace, he was warm to the touch and his chest was big, she wanted to lay her head on it but she stopped herself. "It's cute how much you love your mom," Y/N mentioned when she moved her hand to rest it against her cheek on her pillow.   
  
  
  
Johnny smiled, "she means a lot to me, she's always supported me, it's good to keep the people who support you in your life," he laid his head down, his eyes meeting hers. Dark honey brown eyes flickering across her face. He had the courage to say it, "You're really pretty, Y/N," he smiled when she squeaked and moved her face to plant it into her pillow.   
  
  
  
"Don't start flirting with me, Seo, I'll break your kneecaps."   
  
  
  
"Ay, now that's mean! You should say thank you to a compliment, you silly thing," he knocked his knee against hers and laughed. "I'll keep doing it if you don't look at me!" Johnny wasn't sure where this sudden confidence came from, he did enjoy to tell people pickup lines just to see their reaction it was funny to him, but he was seriously complimenting Y/N and he just so happened to love how flustered she got. And when she wouldn't look at him, he kept going.   
  
  
  
"Your smile is very pretty, you also look really good with makeup but I think I like your bare face more, not that I don't think you should stop wearing makeup, you can do whatever you want but I'm just saying," she pleaded that he'd stop but he just poked her side, "You're pretty good at punching, though you'll have to go to the gym if you want to try and seriously hurt me."   
  
  
  
"Watch it, Seo, I know how I can make you stop," she mumbled. Johnny leaned in teasingly by her ear and asked in a whisper her how. When her knee raised a bit against his crotch, the tall man tensed up. "Anymore flirts and I'll turn you into a girl." He burst into laughter, scooting away slightly.   
  
  
  
"Okay, okay, you got me, Y/N, I surrender."   
  
  
  
After ten more minutes, Johnny bid a-due with a small hug to her and wished her a lovely rest of her day, "I'll be here by 6 next week for the bonfire, okay?" He winked at her before walking away. Y/N shut the front door and grabbed at the ends of her shirt in anxiousness.   
  
  
  
.                    . .   
  
  
  
Y/N had gotten Johnny’s number and they had been able to communicate together until the day of the bonfire. Yuta would always make sure to tease her when she’d smile down at her phone every time she got a text from Johnny. She’d punch him and quickly forget when she’d see the cute picture Johnny sent of him with a puppy (who happened to be wearing the same sweater as him) he had met at a Saturday market. 

 

To say Johnny looked cute was an understatement. He was prepared for a full cuddle night it looked like. With a blue sweater on that had his name is large yellow letters, a big tan cardigan over it, a blanket and pillow under one warm and some big teddy bear in the other he was smiling at Y/N as he walked through the door, greeting her and Yuta who sat on the couch with a hello.   
  
  
  
Yuta eyed the two of them as they smiled to each other and Y/N silently teased Johnny for bringing a teddy bear. "It's unnecessarily huge, why'd you bring it?"   
  
  
  
Johnny hugged the teddy closer to his body, "in case I want to cuddle when I get cold."   
  
  
  
Y/N smiled up at him, suddenly forgetting Yuta was listening in, "but what will I do when I'm cold, I won't have anyone to hold?" Johnny and Yuta froze at the sudden flirt, it was something Y/N wasn't very good at, she herself was surprised and stuttered on her words as she tried to explain that it was a joke. Johnny may have shrugged and laughed it off but Yuta made mental note to use that against her the next time they get into a fight.  "Anyway," she scratched the back of her head, "let's go, Yuta," she grabbed a flimsy hoodie and put it over her sweater.   
  
  
  
Jaehyun had greeted them when their car pulled up unto the driveway. He had a can of beer in his hand and just past him was the glow of a fire and other people there, chairs and wooden benches sat around the fire and she could make out a table with long sticks and an assortments for the making of s'mores. Jaehyun gave Y/N an awkward smile to which she looked down at her feet and kicked pebbles around. She followed her friends to the crowd of people, she didn't recognize anyone but Johnny and Yuta seemed to know just about everyone. Once again Y/N felt out the loop and was already dreading coming to this stupid thing. Being stuck with people you don't know, a dude who's dick you sucked, your roommate and the guy you have a major crush on was not how she wanted to spend her night. Especially when Johnny immediately left her side to go say hi to some tall thin girl who was so much prettier than Y/N. She hugged her arms around her and went and sat on one of the camp chairs in front of the fire, putting her hood up to hide away from the biting autumn wind, she leaned into her chair and pouted.   
  
  
  
"Are you, Y/N?" She heard, she moved her head to look at the short guy who stood by her chair to her left, he had black thin framed glasses, a black cap and some hoodie that had a brand on it she didn't recognize. She nodded slowly, asking the guy why he came up to her. He shrugged, "just wanted to officially meet the girl who has Johnny whipped," he laughed, he put his hand out, "I'm Ten, I'm a very good friend of Johnny's," he introduced. Y/N forced a smile and shook his hand.   
  
  
  
_ Whipped _ . Yeah with the way he's talking to that other girl he must be whipped her Y/N.  _ Whipped my ass, _ she thought to herself.   
  
  
  
"You look down," Ten considered, sitting down in the chair next to hers, she watched him rub his red hands together, trying to warm them up in front of the fire.   
  
  
  
"Being around people I don't know makes me uncomfortable," she said quietly, "Yuta and Johnny kind of ditched me."   
  
  
  
The boy next to her sighed and shook his head, "Johnny can be a bit of an airhead but I think he's just nervous right now and sometimes he avoids people when he is." Y/N scoffed to this, telling him that he must not be nervous if he's talking to that girl with her hair curled and she wore some yellow turtleneck sweater with leggings and rain boots. She looked cute and soft like Johnny, they looked cute together and Y/N hated it. "That's his cousin, forgot her name. She's annoying," Ten chuckled, "but I'm saying he's nervous to talk to you. Johnny likes you a lot and I think he's just trying to calm down before he talks to you." Y/N didn't say anything because she didn't know what to say. She didn't want to deny that he had feelings for her because well by the way he had been talking to her the past two days he said and did things that made her think that he did like her. But she still decided to sulk and pull at her hoodie strings til the hood scrunched up and hid her eyes. She sat there for a few minutes listening to the talking and laughing, no one else had come up to her to say hello or anything.   
  
  
  
She just felt like disappearing.   
  
  
  
So she did, she got up from her seat and decided to go towards the lights of the poles on a small dirt road, judging by the hay on the ground and the tractor tracks she figured she was walking towards a hay field. She had her hands in her pockets and sulked her way down the trail til the sound of the crowd was just a memory in the back of her head. She found a small pond, it was dark now and when she looked up she could see the stars clearly, the moon was bright in the sky and had a blue halo to it that turned into a field of black and twinkling whites. Y/N sat against a tree by the pond, picking at the wet grass and pieces of hay that found themselves there despite being pretty far away from the hay field.   
  
  
  
Y/N barely heard the steps behind her a she was throwing pebbles into the water and shivering from the cold air that was biting at the tip of her nose and her now chapped lips.   
  
  
  
"Y/N?" She gasped and turned around, she recognized the tousled hair and the outline of the man's neck and shoulders. Still holding that god damned teddy bear, Johnny walked up to her til she was looking up at him. "What are you doing here alone?" She looked away, drawing her knees up to her chest and resting her chin atop her knee.   
  
  
  
"Wanted to get away from the crowd. I thought I'd enjoy my time," she sighed. She stared at Johnny shoes, his muddy converse and cuffed jeans, she kept staring til he sat beside her.   
  
  
  
"Mind if I sit with you?"   
  
  
  
A shrug. "You just sat down, so..." Johnny frowned.   
  
  
  
"Y/N, what's wrong? You okay?" He put his hand on her shoulder only for her to shrug it off.   
  
  
  
"I'm sad. I'll get over it." The air was cold and stale and Johnny just felt bad for her. He thought she was comfortable enough to tell him anything but she was closed off and he was scared it was his fault.   
  
  
  
"Did I do anything? You know you can talk to me...right?" Y/N felt like crying, she turned her head away from her and felt a tear run down her face, it felt like ice as it rolled down her cheek and chin and she quickly rubbed it away.   
  
  
  
"I just..feel really alone right now.." he heard her sniffle and his heart went cold and broke in his chest, he knew it was because she was ditched from both him and Yuta. Of course, he should have known by the way she went off and sat alone, of course he took glances at her as he was being polite and saying hello to everyone, it was Jaehyun who had pulled him aside to help him get to know his cousin to which he was a little grossed out over but he took the time to tell his cousin how Jae wasn't her type, their conversation turned to asking about how their love lives were and if he had gotten a girlfriend. By the time he was done, Y/N wasn't anywhere to be seen so he went to investigate. Finding her by the pond crying was the last thing he wanted to find her doing.   
  
  
  
So he scooted closer and put an arm around her, "I'm sorry. It's my fault, I should have known you felt uncomfortable and I should have stuck next to you." Y/N was surprised by how Johnny seemed to toss his teddy aside and give her a full hug around her shoulders. The gesture almost made up for him abandoning her and she put an arm around him, grabbing at his cardigan and pulling at it to bring it closer.   
  
  
  
"It's not your job to stick to me like glue, Johnny. I did feel like I got ditched but it's okay-"   
  
  
  
"It's not, you weren't comfortable and I was too busy talking to notice it. I'm going to try and be there for you more often, okay?" Y/N smiled and moved her head so she rested her chin on Johnny's shoulder. "I really like you, Y/N and I'd rather die than see you upset, especially if it was my fault."   
  
  
  
A chuckle left her chest, "really it was Yuta, he knew I'd be uncomfortable but he tries to get me out of my shell a lot and I appreciate it to a certain extent." When they pulled away, Johnny put both of his hands on her cheeks, they were cold but she didn't care because the temperature in his eyes made her smile and made her forget there was a biting cold breeze around them. He rubbed another tear off her cheek and smiled.   
  
  
  
"I'm super stupid and I know it's not really the best time to ask but..." he rolled his eyes and looked away to bite his bottom lip, "can I kiss you?" His eyes darted back to hers and watched as Y/N smiled widely, more tears dripping down her face. She nodded, a choked out  _ yes  _ came from her mouth and suddenly Johnny's warm lips were on hers. It was like a small tease, the way his lips grazed against hers, she barely got a taste of him so she grabbed at the collar of his sweater and pulled him to closer proximity to push her lips against his harder. Their noses bumped and they giggled, they smiled and their teeth knocked together but even with her chapped lips Johnny was on cloud 9 and was holding the back of her head and her cheek. Oxygen was lost from their memory when they pressed their lips together for a less messy kiss, Johnny tasted like chocolate and peppermint, his hands turned warm and his eyelashes fluttered against her cheeks. They both made a sound in protest when they pulled back to breathe. They watched as the fog from their mouth flowed over their faces and stared at each other for a few seconds, cheeks bright red and chests moving up and down with gasps. Y/N couldn't remember the last time she felt this happy. She felt like she was in a world where her and Johnny only exist and they needed no one but each other. He rubbed his hand over hers, thumb rubbing across her knuckles and smiling at her.   
  
  
  
Y/N cleared her throat, "so," her voice was small and Johnny wanted to hear that tone of voice from her the rest of his life, "does this mean...you like me?" His mind went a little blank and he slapped his palm over his forehead.   
  
  
  
"I forgot to ask you out before asking for a kiss! Dammit, I'm so stupid!"   
  
  
  
Y/N laughed loudly and ended up kissing him again until their lips were swollen and red. She pushed him into the grass, his head landing on the stomach of the teddy bear. She may not have been able to feel his heartbeat from the many layers of clothing but the way he was breathing quickly she could tell her heart was racing just as fast as his.   
  
  
  
"Does Yuta have to keep paying you for cuddles then?"   
  
  
  
Johnny pushed her hoodie off her head to pet his hand over her hair, "Y/N, you get  _ countless _ amounts of cuddles for free, my dear."


End file.
